Tag Archives: Poseidon’s Scribe

Infrequently Asked Questions

Every topnotch website offers a FAQ page. I’d like to add one to this website, but, frankly, you fans haven’t held up your end of the deal. You haven’t asked me enough questions to count any as ‘frequent.’

However, I can ask myself questions, and even answer them. (Hmmm…Do you suppose that’s what’s really going on with most FAQ lists?)

Here’s my list:

Q: Who are you?
A: I’m Steven R. Southard, stirrer of imaginations, weaver of yarns, and your tour guide for grand adventure.

Q: Why would I want to buy your books?
A: To satisfy a yearning in your soul, to complete the missing puzzle piece of your life, and to immerse yourself in amazing new worlds.

Q: What do you write?
A: Science fiction, often inspired by my time as a submariner and engineer.

Q: Why do you write?
A: To let the stories out and keep them from piling up inside. My skull can only stand so much pressure.

Q: What do you typically write about?
A: I enjoy problem-solving and technology. Most often, my characters face complex challenges and must grapple with strange and unproven technologies.

Q: Why do you call yourself Poseidon’s Scribe?
A: It fits me, and attracts a bit of attention. How do I know that? It made you curious enough to ask the question, didn’t it? For a more complete answer, see this blogpost.

Q: What authors inspired you?
A: Readers of my blog know my top answer—Jules Verne. Following him, I’d add Robert Heinlein, Isaac Asimov, Arthur C. Clarke, and Ray Bradbury.

Q: Do you write anything other than short stories?
A: So far, you can only buy my short stories. In the near future, I hope to get some novels published. I dabble in poetry, but only for fun.

Q: Do you have any upcoming book signings, readings, or convention appearances?
A: They’re less frequent than I’d like. I’ll create a Schedule page on this site for that, and make every effort to update it.

Q: What contemporary authors write stories like yours?
A: In terms of story subjects, not literary skill, I’d say Eric Choi, Ray Nayler, and Allen Steele.

Q: What are you working on now?
A: Two novels, a travel book, and two poems. In other words, too much.

Q: I’ve got a sure-fire idea for a story you should write. How do I contact you about putting it into words to finish it up?
A: Tell you what (and I don’t offer this deal to everybody)—if you write the story, I’ll let you take full credit and you can pocket all the resulting royalties.

Few people have asked me any of those questions, so they qualify as ‘infrequently asked.’ I’m certain I failed to ask or answer your most pressing question, so feel free to leave a comment and fire away. Remember to address your inquiry to—

Poseidon’s Scribe

August 4, 2024Permalink 2 Comments

Who Really is Poseidon’s Scribe?

You’ve read my blogposts, but how well do you really know me? Though I’m not the boasting type and prefer to keep my personal life private, I’ll give you a brief summary.

According to my mom, I was born with the stub of a Number 2 pencil in my mouth, and enjoyed scribbling on the rails of my crib. She said I wrote before I could talk. At my request, my baffled parents got me a typewriter for my first birthday.

When schoolteachers asked for a sentence, I gave them 500-word stories, and wrote my first novel at age six. For my best chums, I wrote adventure tales starring them as the heroes. When bullies tormented me, they became (in my stories) ugly villains who met well-deserved deaths. Girls adored my love poems, framed them, and hung them on their bedroom walls.

In the mid-70s, I built a computer and created word-processing software. Sure wish I’d patented them. As a teen, I decided I needed to experience more of life so I could capture it better in my stories. Call it literary research.

So I left home and stowed away aboard a submarine.

Turns out, that’s a crime. I got caught and was sent to an underwater prison, from which I escaped.

No more stowing away. I built my own submarine from junkyard parts (it’s harder than it sounds) and sailed to Greece, then China, and from there to the Brazilian Amazon where I killed a deadly, shape-shifting vampirefish.

Back in 2012, I prevented the end-of-the-world cataclysms predicted by the Mayan calendar. You’re welcome.

I discovered the location of Atlantis, but see no need to reveal it, yet. I built a steam-powered elephant and rumbled through Africa, and constructed a clockwork lion which I rode in France. Fun times, mostly.

While sailing a trireme I made, I visited the sites of all seven wonders of the ancient world. The Great Pyramid was still there, but the others weren’t, so I rebuilt them.

Due to a tragic accident in Wyoming, I lost both legs and one arm. I made very real-looking prosthetic limbs powered by steam, but use my super-strength and hyper-speed only for good.

If you construct a metal coil spring large enough, you can launch yourself to the Moon. I did that once, barely made it back, and won’t go again.

You may not have heard about the comet that nearly caused an extinction level event a few years back. They kept it out of the news. I deflected the comet, with the help of a pack of chewing gum. You’re welcome, again.

After coming across the Ring of Gyges—the invisibility ring mentioned by Plato—I lost the darned thing. If you find it, please give it back. There’s a reward.

I’ve piloted a Martian war tripod through Germany, battled mutant cats in a space station, and flown on self-made wings from the roof of an English abbey. After encountering aliens in New Mexico, I conjured ancestral spirits in Arizona, using a flute. Don’t try any of those yourself.

I’ve raced around the world, been trapped in a haunted submarine, and faced a murderous robot.

After those adventures and a hundred more, I figured I’d gathered enough experience and done enough literary research.

It seemed a good time to settle down and write fiction. And that’s the life story of—

Poseidon’s Scribe

August 27, 2023Permalink

Has It Been 10 Years Already?

I started this Poseidon’s Scribe blog in January 2011, so it seems I’ve been doing this for a decade now. I’m closing in on 600 blog posts (this is my 587th). Hard to believe Poseidon’s Scribe is ten years old.

It was very kind of author Todd Sullivan to interview me on the subject of blogging discipline. You can watch the interview on YouTube.

In fact, I’ve included a new Interviews tab on my website, so you can read or view all the interviews of your favorite blogger and author.

Back to Todd Sullivan’s interview of me. In that video, I provided the following overall advice about blogs:

  • Valuable content. Provide useful information to readers.
  • Quality writing. Keep posts brief, interesting, and well written.
  • Clean appearance. Make your site uncluttered and easy to navigate.
  • Periodic posts. Establish a rhythm of posting and stick to it.

Here’s what I advised about starting a blog:

  • Write down why you want to blog. What’s your niche?
  • Identify your intended audience. Whom are you writing to?
  • What might your audience want to know, that you can provide?
  • Write down 20 topics for your first 20 blogposts
  • Add to that list as you come across other ideas
  • Commit to posting on a regular schedule (helps you, readers, and site popularity)
  • Don’t expect instant followers, comments, or notice, let alone fame.

This was what I said about writing individual blogposts:

  • Craft an interesting and useful subject line. Numbers catch readers’ eyes, as do the words you, your, and you’re.
  • Include an image or video with your posts
  • Start with a rough outline before writing, but be willing to deviate from it.
  • Edit by imagining you’re a reader just surfing to that post. Cut boring stuff. No long paragraphs. Keep the overall post short.
  • Proofread before publishing

To supplement the advice I gave in the interview, I’d add this—it’s best not to dedicate your blog to the craft of writing. The net is saturated with writers writing about writing. Consider blogging about the subjects you write about instead. If your fiction focuses on certain settings, or characters, or themes, write about them.

I’ll go further than that. Consider not blogging at all. Set up a website, sure. It can be a fairly static one, with your bio, your bibliography, your scheduled appearances, etc. But think about this before you start blogging: time spent blogging is time you could be spending on your fiction.

Back in 2011, experts advised all beginning writers to blog. It was, and remains, a good way to increase your online footprint and to raise your site ranking in searches for the topics you blog about.

However, I’m not sure it increases sales of your fiction, or improves the quality of your stories. Think about that before you start a blog.

If your goal is better fiction, or more sales, work on your fiction and your marketing.

For me, though, a decade-old habit is hard to break. You can look forward to more years of steady blogging from—

Poseidon’s Scribe

February 14, 2021Permalink

Captain Nemo and I

Many people have commented on how much I have in common with Captain Nemo. Not just in appearance:

I’m the one on the right. Want more proof? Just look at this table of inexplicable parallels:

AttributeCaptain NemoPoseidon’s Scribe
Known by 2-word pseudonymYesYes
TrainingEngineeringEngineering (Naval Architecture)
Submarine constructionBuilt his own submarineHelped overhaul a submarine
Submarine operationCaptain of his own submarineOfficer aboard a submarine
Polar experienceTraveled by submarine to South PoleTraveled by submarine near North Pole
MusicPlayed pipe organPlayed cello and piano
BirthplaceBundelkhand – middle of a country (India)Wisconsin – middle of a country (USA)
AgeBetween 35 and 50Used to be between 35 and 50
Pacific island experienceMarooned on Lincoln IslandVisited Hawaii
WeaponryElectric RifleElectric Pistol (not fully operational)
Lost civilization experienceDiscovered AtlantisWrote a story about Atlantis
LanguagesFluent in French, English, German, Latin, and BundeliAdept in using Google to translate 107 languages
Electrical experienceUsed electric rails to shock Papuan nativesElectrically shocked self during home repairs
WealthImmensely rich from salvaging treasureOften imagined being rich
RoyaltyBorn a princeListened to music by Prince

I know, it’s eerie, right? It’s not like I set out to pattern my life after Captain Nemo. I doubt very much that I’m somehow related to him, or that I’m a reincarnation of him. However, I wouldn’t dismiss those possibilities out of hand, either.

At this point, I’d like to ease the fears of any mariners reading this post. Despite my many similarities to Captain Nemo, I have no immediate plans to voyage around the world’s oceans, ramming ships along the way. Sailors of all vessels at sea are safe from any attack by me.  

I promise to use my Nemo-like powers only for good, like co-editing 20,000 Leagues Remembered, an anthology recently launched by Pole to Pole Publishing.

For the record, I am—

Captain Nemo

…er, I mean

Poseidon’s Scribe

July 19, 2020Permalink

Being Poseidon’s Scribe

Many fans have noticed the headline of my website:  “Poseidon’s Scribe—Advice for beginning scribblers, straight from Olympus.”  Questions have been pouring in about that, and it’s time I answered them.

Are you really Poseidon’s Scribe?  Yes.  It’s not the sort of thing you’d make up, or dare to impersonate.

PoseidonI thought Poseidon was a myth.  Does he really exist?  Oh, yes.  God of the Sea, Earth-Shaker, Tamer of Horses.  He exists, all right.  And he gets rather upset when some mortals think him a myth, so I’d believe in him if I were you, especially if you’re going near water.

The Romans called him Neptune; does he prefer to go by Poseidon?  He’ll answer to either name, but I think deep down he prefers the one with more syllables.

Why does he need a scribe?  I never really thought to ask him.  The twelve gods and goddesses in the pantheon each have one, probably because they want their exploits preserved for posterity, but can’t be bothered to write for themselves.

What sort of things does he have you write about?  Oh, you know.  On this day, he created an island.  On that day, he got angry at some sailors who worshiped him insufficiently, so he sent a storm.  Made whirlpools, created sea-monsters, went to New Orleans in mortal form to have a good time at Mardi Gras.  That sort of thing.

What is Poseidon like to work for?  Officially? A great guy, a wonderful boss.  (But the stuff I could tell you…!)

How did you get the job?  Saw the ad, sent my resume, sat for an interview.  Pretty much the same as any job.  Well, except for being teleported to Olympus for the interview.  He looked over samples of my writing, and must have liked them.

What does the job pay?  Poseidon didn’t really get the whole ‘salary’ thing at first, so I had to be insistent.  Then he wanted to pay me in gold, with a morsel of ambrosia and a half cup of nectar a month.  I finally introduced him to direct deposit.  Basically the salary isn’t stellar; it’s about what a Grecian earns.

What are your work hours?  Irregular, to say the least.  At any time of day, Poseidon can pop in and demand I write some account of him making a sea spout to terrorize people, or whipping up a squall for fun.  After the first month, I got the hang of the self-glorifying language he preferred, so it’s a rare week when I need to work more than forty hours.  That leaves time for my hobby, writing fiction.  I’m just glad I’m not Hermes’ scribe; that poor guy has to write fast.

Where is your office?  Can you work from home?  I do work at home, actually, though on some occasions the sea-god teleports me to some ocean or other to see an event (or its aftermath) myself so I can describe it as an actual witness.

Do you get benefits?  No.  Although I keep telling Poseidon it’s a full-time job and I’m entitled to benefits, he’s an immortal and considers me a temp.

Can Poseidon fire you?  Or worse?  In theory, yes.  There was a period, a few centuries ago when he would turn his scribes into goats or banish them to Hades if they wrote poor accounts.  But that led to a shortage of mortal volunteers, so now there’s a process he has to follow.  No changing into any sort of animal without thirty days advance notice, arbitration hearings, full documentation of deficiencies, access to a lawyer, etc.  I think my job’s pretty safe.

How do I get a job like that?  Well, there are only so many gods, and they like to hire young scribes who will serve for a full mortal career, so positions don’t open that often.  If I had to guess, I’d say Hephaestus’ scribe would be next to retire, maybe in fifteen years or so.  If you’re into writing about fire, metalworking, masonry, and sculpture, that could be the job for you!

There you have it.  If you think of more questions, just leave a comment or click on Contact in my menu above to send an e-mail to—

                                                           Poseidon’s Scribe

February 17, 2013Permalink